Slaphappy hairy pits

     It's just been that kind of day and I could commit a homicide if I were promised a big corner brownie for it (I like the crunchy corners the best).  I returned home from taking Fia to dance, to find one child in time out (we call it "reset") for using potty words, and the rest of the kids sitting at dinner with  Dan.  Well, sitting might not be the right word.  They were full-on slaphappy.  Someone slipped them crack, or some sugary red dye #40 kool-aid while I wasn't looking or something.  They were loud, crazy -- possibly deranged.  There were at least 52 references to butts or pee or other bodily parts/functions, one child wearing a zip up sweatshirt as pants and jumping up to yell, "Look at my tail," as he waggled the sweatshirt's dangling hood between his legs, several elephant imitations, a few weakly muffled belches, and the piece de resistance:  the following conversation.

     Nate:  "Anna, a trick question...what is one plus one?"

     Anna:  "Uh, 2, duh!"

     Nate:  "No, one plus one is-"

     Jamey, interrupting:  "Hairy pits!!!"

     This, of course, set off much laughter and discussion about hair, armpits, and smells.  I finally got Nate to clear the dishes, but right now, from upstairs, I hear some sort of assault being launched with a hair dryer (which the teenaged daughter left out after using it to dry her nails).  Someone is spitting something offensive out of his mouth, and the house has that "the-middles-of-the-rooms-are-sort-of-clean- because-we-piled-everything-up-on-the-surfaces-and-shoved-it-all-to-the-edges" look. Ah, and just now, someone let the dog out who is barking at all the passsersby.  Annnddd, now they just went out after her.  Maybe they'll put away the three tires they stacked in the middle of the yard, their father's baseball stuff they dragged out, the multiple shoes, socks, scooters, bikes, toys, tools, trucks, and sippy cups they left out.  Oh yeah, and maybe they'll put away the bent, rusted, broken 5' bit of shale bar that they keep sticking into the ground in weird spots all over the yard like a minimalist sculpture.  Or not.  I bet they're on my dirt pile that we're in the process of moving into the raised bed garden boxes that I built (almost all by myself, I might add).  I'm just gonna hide in here until Dan gets back with Fia.  On the upshot, I made a cool broccoli salad for lunch.  I thought I'd share the reason and the recipe.

     I have started working out with some Richard Simmons DVD's.  And they are hysterically fun.  Hard, too!  So I ordered his Foodmover system and have been following some of his plan. And I am starving.  Sigh.  It's all about portion control.  That's tough for me.  I don't eat too terribly  - pretty healthfully, actually,  compared to the standard American diet.  I just like food.  And brownies.  And Cadbury eggs. A lot.  So today as I was snapping closed little purple Foodmover windows and contemplating what I could eat, I decided on a broccoli salad with some ingredients I had on hand.  It would be great with a few raw cashews or almonds thrown in, too.  This is a lunch serving for one, so increase accordingly, as desired:

1 cup raw broccoli, broken into tiny 1" florets
1/4 cup mandarin oranges, cut in half (the kind packed in juice with no added sugar)
1 tbs very finely minced onion
1/3 cup baby bell pepper slivers (i used one red, one orange, one yellow - i get them in a 2lb bag...they are very small)
1 tsp fresh grated ginger (or the grated bottled fresh from the produce section, not powdered from baking aisle)
1 tbs juice from mandarin oranges
1 1/2 tsp lemon juice
2 tsp extra virgin olive oil
few cracks of black pepper
pinch of garlic salt
few pinches sea salt

1. Mix orange and lemon juice, ginger, salt, garlic salt, pepper in a small mixing bowl and whisk together. Let marinate while you cut up the veggies and oranges.
2. Throw the rest of the ingredients in and stir around to coat.
3. Add the oil, stir really well, and allow to marinate about 5-10 minutes, then serve.

     I also thought I'd throw a few numbers around for your amusement as well, before signing off.  In the last two days...

The number of sticks I found in the house yesterday: 3.5

The number of times I had to run Dan and Nate's paintball camo stuff through the wash because I kept forgetting it was in the washer: 4

The number of baskets of clean laundry waiting to be folded: 4

The number of times I asked the kids to clean up the yard: 3

The number of academic subjects I taught or oversaw daily: 7

The number of times I cleaned out the baby chickens' waterer: 5

The number of times I "Partied off the Pounds" with Richard Simmons: 1

The number of times I told Fia or Nate to sit down and do their school work: 15, 000

The number of times I have desired to eat chocolate: 21, 600 (every 4 seconds or so)

The number of times I wished I had someone else's life:  0

Blessings and Love to you all,
MamaWebb